Blue Alert - 10

“James”

-x-

WHEN I woke, I felt absolutely miserable. No, maybe not miserable, but definitely not the greatest in the world. I don’t know how the hell I got that way, but I was tired to the bone. I really didn’t want to move. So I didn’t. I didn’t bother getting up at all. I just rolled over onto my back and stretched like some lazy cat on the floor after a nap, even though I didn’t feel as refreshed as most cats probably did when they woke up.

Sunlight shone through my window, licking at my foot. It was warm. Kinda toasty. If I really was a cat I’d probably love to bathe in that. I wasn’t a cat, but I still wanted to bathe in it. Rolling over, I scooted into the path of the sun, groaning a little as my body protested. Man, what the hell did I do? Work a triathlon in my sleep?

I wish I could remember what my dreams were about because they were really kicking my ass. I had to stop having all this active dreams of else I was just going to tire myself out completely. Sighing, I turned over to let the sun warm my back as I stretched out on my side. I wanted to close my eyes and fall asleep again, maybe doze off for another hour or two, so I let the warmth of the sun lull me back to sleep.

When I woke again, it felt like I still hadn’t slept enough. I rolled over to face the window this time and tried to go back to sleep, but I could see the sun through the backs of my eyelids, which made it impossible. I stayed there for a while until a cloud managed to pass before the sun and steal my warmth away. I wasn’t all the inclined to stay on the floor anymore so I got up and dragged myself to the kitchen for some breakfast.

I still wasn’t quite in the habit of buying my own things yet, but I did go to the store a few days ago to get some basic foods. Mostly premade or really easy to make. Which included milk and cereal. Easy breakfast. Lasted a long time. Only thing that spoiled was the milk, but if I kept it in the fridge there was nothing to worry about. It was hassle free.

I made myself a bowl and ate by the counter since I didn’t have any chairs to use. I was tempted to go get foldable chairs, but then again, wouldn’t I need a table too? Who knew buying for yourself was actually this challenging? At least I wasn’t too picky about the bed situation, so I had no problem sleeping on the floor. I could probably use one of those futon things though. They folded up and I heard they were easy to take care of. They were probably expensive as hell, though. I was better off getting myself one of those nifty sleeping bags that could open and close.

After breakfast, I hung out by the window and soaked up the sun. I had a feeling today was going to be a lazy day. I didn’t have work, and other than trying to do some planning and paperwork, I basically had an easy going day.

I was really glad I had no work today. Nothing to do but stay at home and relax for once. Don’t get me wrong, I needed the money, I needed the hours, but the last few days got a little weird for me. Martin was starting to get a little too close for personal comfort. He was a great guy and all, and he probably didn’t mean any harm, but I had this problem with people where I didn’t like having my bubble popped.

This was probably part of the reason why I never got along with my mother’s boyfriends. Some of them were just a little too close for comfort. I remembered that one of them really creeped me out and we didn’t get along in the slightest. I blocked out most of those memories.

Martin wasn’t nearly as bad as the others, but the signal in the back of my head was still there. I had a feeling he just wanted to be friends because I was one of the few people at work who actually tolerated the guy. Still, I wish he knew what the hell a personal bubble was. Maybe I shouldn’t have allowed him to sit with me at lunch that day.

At least I didn’t have to deal with him right now, so that was good. I could just laze about like a normal teen like I used to. I stretched out by the window to do some of that paperwork I hadn’t finished before. It was some confusing stuff about the house. The lawyer wanted me to read over it and try to understand what was being said in it. If I had plans of selling the house, I needed to know what to do. If I didn’t want to sell it, I still needed to know what lay before me.

It was pretty boring stuff if you asked me, but I forced myself to pay attention. I bet school didn’t teach you about this. In fact, now that I thought about it, school didn’t really teach you much of anything. Not these sort of survival skills anyway. They taught you how to find the derivative, name the leaders of our country and their accomplishments and failures, and write with proper grammar and spelling. Stuff like mortgage, personal finances, how to get your own apartment, work at various jobs, cook meals so you don’t starve, conserve energy so your bill isn’t sky high... those sorts of things... you had to go to specialized classes for. You had to pay big bucks in college or at some studio or seminar or whatever to learn anything useful.

But kids? Teens? High school? All that? Nothing. It was practically useless. High school didn’t even prepare you for the future. It just tied off the end of your basic academics. And let you be creative in how to bend the school rules to your liking. You could get away with a lot of shit in high school that you couldn’t in normal life. Way to raise false expectations, guys.

I guess I should have been glad I wasn’t in school right now. I was learning things most other kids didn’t. ...I just had to lose my family for it to happen. Every time I thought about it I couldn’t help but sigh and wonder just how fortunate I was. I probably wasn’t very fortunate at all. Most kids would love to be without their parents, but were they ready for the responsibilities?

Rolling over onto my back, I blew up at my bangs. I didn’t mean to work myself into a spiral of jaded thoughts but going through all that paperwork alone was getting to me. Maybe it was time I had a break. Take a stroll down the street or something. Do some grocery shopping.

Sitting up, I got to my feet and went to dig out some fresh clothes for the day. I changed and made my way to the bathroom to make sure I didn’t look like a mess before going out. I stopped just inside when I saw clothes hanging on the towel rack. I couldn’t remember putting them there. Frowning, I tried to rake my brain for the time when I even wore these clothes, let alone hung them up in the bathroom.

I touched the shirt and noticed it was damp. Apparently I got them wet too. Was it raining? No, it hadn’t rained for a while. Did I try to hand wash them? If I did, I forgot to put them in front of the fan so that they’d dry faster.

Shaking my head of the confusion, I went to go get the box fan I had brought over from the house so that the clothes could finally dry. Even if I didn’t know when I did any of this stuff, I didn’t want them to attract any mildew or mold.

After setting the fan to blow on my clothes, I fixed my appearance and brushed my teeth before heading out. As I made my way down, I still thought about how the hell my clothes managed to get out of the closet. Actually, were those really my clothes? The shopping experience was fuzzy, but I was pretty sure I bought them. I didn’t need to second guess myself.

Though I did have that whole sleep walking thing going on... Maybe I washed my clothes in my sleep. I had never done that before but I wouldn’t be surprised. I mean, just recently I had another incident where I left the window open and woke up in nothing but my boxers. It didn’t really bother me then, but I wondered if my episodes were taking a turn for the worse.

There were times when I would sleep walk a lot, and times when it didn’t happen all that often. Maybe it was one of those worse times again. Inwardly shrugging at the thought, I made my way to the bus stop and sat down on the bench. I probably didn’t have to worry about it.

When the bus arrived, I took it to the nearest grocery store. If there was one thing I noticed when I first shopped on my own, people tended to watch. They didn’t outright stare at me while I picked stuff up and paid for them, but they kinda glanced for a little too long, as if wondering if I was accompanied by my parent or guardian while I was shopping. I think they were surprised to find out I was on my own. But then again, maybe they thought my mom or dad was waiting for me in the car. Some parents did that. Not mine, though.

While I did my shopping today, I was on my own, and I couldn’t really get too much since I had no way of bringing it back except by bus. I got whatever I was missing or low in stock of, minimizing my amount to three bags at the most. When I was in the checkout lane, I saw a newspaper in one of the stands. I hadn’t picked one up in a while, so I added it.

Newspapers had to be another little change I had to deal with. I never really paid attention to the news before, and if I did read the news it was on the internet while I was on the computer. Yahoo was good at spitting out all these random articles from dating advice to Wallstreet to the latest sports scores. The local newspaper wasn’t so fancy, but it did its job. And besides, if I got it on the right day, everyone came out with their coupons and advertisements for sales. As a single independent, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity.

After paying, I made my way back to bus stop. I pulled out the paper while I waited. Of course, like any self respecting individual, I immediately searched for the comics section. I went over all the funnies and started looking at some of the rest of the section before the bus came.

On the ride home, I browsed through some of the local news. I couldn’t do the crossword like I wanted to because I didn’t have a pen on me. Apparently there were a couple new red light sensor things up on some of the streets with traffic problems. The police must’ve gotten a lot of money on a regular basis from all the tickets that were dished out because of those things. I always heard the others at work complaining about them.

Moving on to other parts of the paper, I skimmed over the headlines for anything worth noting. Someone was running a fundraiser for cancer again, and some other dude was talking about tearing down one of the old buildings on the other side of town. None of it really interested me. At least there wasn’t any news about someone else dying.

I wasn’t really sure what I was looking for while reading the newspaper but I guess some part of me was still expecting to hear something about the killer who attacked my mom. Maybe he was caught. Or maybe he attacked someone else and was still on the loose. Who was he? Where was he? What was his motive? Who would he go after next? The lack of news was disappointing.

When I came to my bus stop, I made my way back to the apartment. As I was crossing the lot, I saw a familiar face just a little bit ahead of me. I quickened my step as he made his way toward the elevator, smiling at him as we both waited for the elevator. “Hey.”

Allen smiled back at me. “How are you? I take it you just came from the store?”

I nodded. Since the first time I ran into him, I never ran into Allen again. This was the second time we were going to take the elevator together. “Yeah. I saw I was low on supplies. I’m doing okay, just busy.” I glanced at his clothes and saw he was in casual wear. “Are you off work today?”

“I am. I just finished running some errands.” When the elevator arrived, he held the doors open for me and pressed the button for our respective floors. “How is it, living by yourself? Gotten used to it yet?”

“Somewhat. I still have trouble remembering when to do certain chores like cleaning the floor or the bathroom, doing laundry, cooking for myself... I’ve never done so much on my own before.” I never really talked to anyone about my new life either. I talked to Connor a couple times, so he knew, but beyond him no one really knew about my situation. Except Allen. And he seemed like a decent guy so I didn’t see any problem with telling him what was going on. Besides, he helped me out. Even if he was just asking me these things because he worked on my case, he deserved to know, right? “It’s really hard.”

Allen gave an understanding nod. “It’s not easy.”

“Do you live alone?”

“I do, so I know what you’re going through. I had to struggle the first few months I was on my own. I underestimated what it meant to live alone and pay for everything myself. You seem to be fairing well.”

I shrugged. “I guess so.”

“Better than I did, I’m sure.” He smiled at me. I knew he was just flattering me, but I smiled back anyway. Even though this was only the second time we talked to each other, I already knew I liked him. He was different in uniform and out of it. Not significantly so, but he was a lot friendlier. He smiled, too.“If you need any help, or if you’re hungry and can’t figure anything out, just give me a call. You should have my work number, it’s my cellphone.” And he offered food, apparently. That deserved some cool points there.

“Are you sure? I thought...”

“As an officer, I can only give you so much personal help. I have to follow a system. But as a neighbor, you’re welcome to come to me. Only a cruel person would turn their back on someone in need.”

The elevator dinged and opened. I stepped through the doors, pausing to look back at Allen. “I’ll... I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. See you later, James.”

I bid Allen farewell in return before heading down to my apartment. I didn’t really expect to run into Allen, let alone receive an offer to eat with him anytime I wanted. Okay, maybe it wasn’t anytime I wanted, but he didn’t say it had to be just one time either. I could probably eat at his place multiple times if I wanted to. Or needed to.

Frowning slightly in thought, I put the food away in the cupboards and fridge. Would he really not mind if I did? What if I made it a habit? I didn’t plan on it, but what if I did? What if I really took up his offer and said, “Hey, can we have lunch together?” Maybe I ought to try it out, just to see what would happen. Would it be a good experience? A bad one? I never would know if unless I put my foot out.

After putting everything away, I searched through my pile of papers for the stuff I got from the police station and Allen. I knew I had his number somewhere, I just had to figure out where. It took me a few minutes to find the file with the information on it. Ever since I started doing all this paperwork on my own, I got into the habit of filing stuff. It wasn’t all that different from putting away my homework from school in the right colored folders, only this time I couldn’t afford to lose this stuff.

Pulling out my phone, I dialed Allen’s number. I hesitated before patching it through, still wondering if it was okay to take up his offer or not. “Hello?”

Apparently I didn’t have the opportunity to back out even if I wanted to. “Hello? Uh, Allen?”

“This is he. Who is this?”

“It’s James. James Young? From the elevator?”

“Oh, hey James. I didn’t recognize your voice for a second there. What can I do for you?”

“Um, well you know how you said I could call you anytime if I needed help or was hungry or something? Is that offer still open?”

“Of course it is.”

“Could we... maybe... I mean, can I have dinner with you?” That sounded awkward even in my own ears. Did I come off as a mooch to him? Or a pathetic sap? Would he look down on me for jumping at the opportunity to get a free meal? Was he just joking when he said I could mooch off of him?

I could hear something almost like chuckling on the other end of the line. “Yes, you can. Does six sound okay for you?”

“Yeah, that’s fine!” Insert mental sigh of relief here. Allen didn’t seem bothered by my request. I guess that meant he didn’t offer me food halfheartedly. He really was going to allow me to eat with him.

Allen gave me his room number and said to just knock or ring the bell when I came over. Call me weird, but it felt good to know I had food waiting for me and I didn’t have to go slapping something together from the fridge. Sandwiches were easy to make, so were eggs, cereal, and canned soup, but I could only eat that stuff so many times. I needed something else too, right?

I spent the rest of my time between the phone call and meeting Allen with just lying around and reading more of the newspaper. As time came closer to six, I lost my concentration. My stomach started growling at me so loudly I was tempted to hit it to make it shut up. Instead, I just got up and left the apartment to go up to Allen’s floor.

The ride itself, though short, seemed to take forever. I guess I was just that anxious to eat. Or maybe it was the company. Or both. Eating alone did get lonely. It was quiet all the time. And it wasn’t like I had the television to keep me occupied. Even though I took another trip with Connor to clear out more stuff from the house, I didn’t pick up any electronics except for the essentials. Television, unfortunately, did not count. I brought the computer, though. Even though I didn’t have internet. Which was pointless.

Anyway, having someone to eat dinner with was a nice change and I could hardly keep still. I almost had to stop myself from rushing out of the elevator when the doors opened. At least I had to slow down while I looked for Allen’s apartment number. It wasn’t that hard, since I only had to look on one side. Coming up to the door, I rang the bell and waited for him to answer.

Allen didn’t make me wait long. I heard him unlock the door and open it, and smiled at him. “Hey.”

“Come on in,” he said, and stepped aside to let me in. As he locked up after me, I took a look around his place. It was a lot more furnished than my own apartment, but then again Allen wasn’t in school, he had a steady income, he was older, and he lived here longer than me. Of course he would’ve had time to decorate and make every inch of it his own. “Make yourself comfortable. I’m almost done.”

I watched as Allen moved to the kitchen and followed after him a little to see what he was doing. I could smell food cooking and it was good. Really good. I couldn’t wait to dig in. “What is it?”

“Italian lasagna with beef, spinach, ricotta cheese, mozzarella, and Parmesan.” Lasagna. No wonder it smelled so good. “You’re not allergic to nutmeg, are you?”

I blinked at him. “Um, no? I don’t think so.”

“Good. There’s a bit of nutmeg in here as well.”

I leaned against the breakfast bar that separated the kitchen from the rest of the apartment and watched him as he pulled the lasagna out of the oven and started pulling down plates and silverware and glasses for us to eat. “Did you make it yourself or did you buy it?”

“I made it.” He looked over his shoulder and smirked at me. It kinda looked funny. He was so straight-faced at work, I didn’t think he was capable of such expressions. Maybe he was a lot more different than I initially thought. “Is that hard to believe?”

“Actually, yeah. No offense but you don’t look like you make your own food.”

He chuckled at that. “I’ve heard that before. I cook most of my meals. I don’t always have the time to do it from scratch, but I’ll do it whenever I can.”

“Well it smells really good.”

“Thank you.” He moved from the kitchen to set the table. I didn’t quite see his face, but I was pretty sure he was smiling again. I think he liked that I complimented him on his food, even if I hadn’t even taken a bite of it yet. It made me wonder how often he cooked for other people. Did he have a girlfriend? Lover? Fiancee? Was he even straight? I’d never heard of a gay officer before, but it wasn’t impossible. Right?

Looking around, I tried to find evidence of a significant other. I was curious. I didn’t see any pictures, though. Not on the wall and not on the shelf. Well, there was one frame over in the corner, but from a distance it looked like it was of his family. Mom, dad, siblings, dog. That sort of thing.

“What would you like to drink, James?”

Hearing his voice, I looked at him distractedly. “Huh? Oh, um, water is okay.”

“Alright.” Allen went to the fridge and poured our glasses with water. I tried to peek inside his fridge, just to see what he had inside, and saw it was full of all sorts of stuff. I think I even saw a few cans of beer in there. So he drank.

Call me nosy, but I couldn't help being a little curious about what it was like around here. This was my first time seeing a single (maybe) guy’s apartment. I had been to my friends’ places before, but most of them lived in homes with their parents or other relatives. Even if they lived in apartments, they were accompanied by someone else. No one lived completely on their own.

I watched Allen bring the lasagna over to the table and set it on a couple heat pads. When he beckoned, I joined him at the table and sat in the chair opposite of him. If smelling it earlier hadn’t been enough, being up close was even better. Man, I wished I could bake lasagna from scratch.

Allen cut us sections of the lasagna and put it on our plates before sitting down so we could eat. I didn’t hesitate to take the first sample, and nearly burned a hole through my mouth in the process. Eagerness led to stupid decisions. Allen seemed amused by my efforts and watched me try to eat without burning myself. He didn’t outright laugh at me, but I could tell by his gaze he wanted to.

Throughout dinner we talked and ate, touching upon random topics like sports, the food, and how I was doing. He didn’t offer me any information about his work or the investigation about my mom, and I didn’t ask him. I already knew he couldn’t tell me even if he wanted to; it wasn’t his business anymore, he wasn’t in charge. I was just some kid he knew, now. Besides, I doubted he had any concrete information to tell me anyway. I doubted that anyone would be able to come up with anything significant.

As we finished up, I offered to help Allen clean up. He said I didn’t have to, but I knew at least some manners. I helped him clear the table and wash and dry the dishes. Another thing I noticed was that he didn’t use his washer to wash his dishes. He did them by hand. I asked him about it and he said it was not only cheaper on his bill, he enjoyed it. If he could, he would get rid of the dish washer completely, but it came with the apartment so there wasn’t much he could do about it so he used it as a drying rack most of the time. I never thought of that.

Allen didn’t kick me out when we were done so we talked some more. I asked him about what it was like living on his own and he told me a few personal stories. He even gave me tips on ways to cut down on electricity and water bills, and save my money for more important things like food, clothes, and all the other essentials.

It wasn’t for a few hours that I finally left his place. He sent me back with another section of lasagna in some Tupperware plastic and said I didn’t have to return it if I didn’t want to. I asked if we could eat together again sometime and he said we could. All I needed to do was give him a call and he’d let me know if he was available or not. That was best thing I heard all night.

Needless to say I had a happy night. I might’ve woken up miserable, but the day ended just fine. It wouldn’t be for a few days before I’d run into trouble.

-x-

I was just entering the restaurant at work when one of the other employees confronted me. I was in the back, putting on my apron when she grabbed me by the arm. I was pretty sure her name was Marie. I stared at her, startled, not sure what she wanted. “Yes...?”

“Hey, watch out today.” When I raised my brows, she leaned in. “Some cops came in just a little while ago asking everyone around about that Martin guy.”

“Martin?”

“Yeah. He’s dead! They found him today. Candice heard them saying that someone broke into his apartment and murdered him! Now they’re checking out all the places and people he’s been involved with. They’ll probably ask you too, so watch out.” She wore such a serious look on her face, I almost thought she was constipated. If the subject matter hadn’t been just as serious, I might’ve laughed at the way she looked.

It was kinda hard to laugh when finding out someone was dead, though. Least of all someone familiar. I didn’t really know Martin all that well, but we did talk a few times. I wasn’t really for or against him so I couldn’t really say I was all that sad that he was dead. It was just unfortunate, y’know? A stroke of bad luck. Kinda like with my family.

I finished getting ready for work after Marie left me alone and made my way to the front. I saw who she was talking about as they took aside one of the other workers and sat at the back table to talk. I almost expected to see Allen amongst the two but he wasn’t there. I guess he wasn’t on the case.

I wasn’t really expecting him to be, but I thought that he would be anyway. I didn’t know why, it was just one of those things you didn't really think through. You just... thought. If that made any sense whatsoever. It probably didn’t. Anyway, after finding out Allen wasn’t on the team, I didn’t give them much attention. I wasn’t too interested in knowing what was going on over there, even if it had to do with someone I worked with.

Of course, I couldn’t ignore it forever. It was only a matter of time before I was called up to bat. About an hour into my shift, my boss, Mr. Tsong, took me aside and told me what was going on. It was just as Marie had said. After that, I was sat down in front of the cops.

They introduced themselves to me as Officer Bourney and Officer Rocha. No first names. Did no one give their first names or was Allen the only one? I didn’t know anyone else’s first name except his. Then again, he was the one I talked to the most. Officer Bourney and Rocha were nothing like Allen when they talked to me. They gave me a basic rundown of what happened to Martin (whose last name was Bailey, apparently; that was the first time I learned that) before asking my relationship with him.

“He was just someone I worked with. We weren’t really friends. We weren’t enemies either, we just happened to be in the same place as each other.”

“What was he like at work?”

I shrugged. “I dunno. I don’t really pay that close attention. I mean, I guess he was a friendly sort of guy. He talked to everyone. He was pretty open. He liked trying to get close to people.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Well, he kinda had this habit of popping people’s personal bubbles. I don’t think he meant any harm in it, he probably just wanted to make friends, but a lot of people don’t really like it when someone gets too close, y’know? At least not without proper introductions and slowly getting to know them first and all that stuff. Martin kinda skipped a lot of those steps. Not everyone found it easy talking to him.”

“Did you find it easy to talk to him?”

“Kinda. I guess. I didn’t ignore him or anything like that, but it wasn’t exactly a walk in the park to get past the bubble popping thing when he did that.”

“Did a lot of people get upset whenever he ‘popped’ their ‘bubbles’?”

I shrugged again. “Everyone’s civil, if that’s what you’re talking about, but they probably had trouble too. I dunno.”

They asked a few more questions but they were all pretty much the same tangent. I answered them as best I could, but it wasn’t really much since I wasn’t all that close to Martin. I stayed away more than I got close. If I could. Officer Bourney and Rocha probably didn’t find me all that helpful.

Once they were done with me, I returned to my job for the rest of the shift. They left sometime during then, but I didn’t quite catch them leave until they were already pulling out of their parking spot in front of the restaurant. After that, nothing else really happened, though Mr. Tsong did call for a group meeting at the end of the day.

We talked about what happened today and the possibility of them coming back one more time if they deemed it necessary. He said that he wasn’t going to withhold information if they wanted to talk to us outside of work, and that we should be prepared to have another chat if they came knocking. He hoped none of us were involved, and that we would be careful about crazy people breaking into our homes. After we all agreed to take care of ourselves, he bid us a safe trip home.

As much as Mr. Tsong’s concern was endearing and all, the police didn’t come knocking on my door. Not that night, not the next day, or the day after that. They left me alone and that was that.