“James”
-x-
TWISTING around, I struggled to get into a comfortable position. My limbs ached and it felt like I had been crammed into a box too small. Groaning, I turned and opened my eyes, frowning at the throbbing in the back of my head. If I knew what the a hangover felt like, I bet it would’ve felt something like this.
I looked around, groggy and achy. At first, nothing seemed familiar. This wasn’t my room. This wasn’t my apartment. I wasn’t in bed. Where was I? I tried to sit up and look around, taking in my surroundings.
“Are you awake?”
The familiar voice came from behind me. I shifted to look and saw Allen approaching from the other side of the couch. He wore a strange expression on his face; I couldn’t quite tell what he was feeling as he looked at me, but it felt a little unsettling.
“Y-Yes? Where...?” I looked around again, my surroundings suddenly becoming more recognizable. I saw the familiar kitchen, the familiar table, the picture in the corner, the couch... I was in Allen’s apartment. How did I get here?
I made as if to get up but found myself tangled in something. Startled, I looked down at myself and saw my legs had been tied. I had a sheet over me in makeshift canopy, almost like a blanket or something. And my hands... My hands were behind my back. I couldn’t move them at all. “What...? How--?!”
“Hold on, let me set you loose.”
I looked up as Allen came around and helped me into a sitting position. He removed the sheet from around me and untied my feet. It looked like one of those bungee cord things you normally use in the back of your truck so stuff didn’t slide around. Did he tie it himself? I turned around for him to get my arms and carefully brought them forward again.
My wrists were sore and I was pretty sure they were bruised. Gingerly rubbing at the marks, I glanced over at what Allen had taken off and saw they were handcuffs. Whoa. Where did those come from? I gave him a strange look, shocked and very very confused.
“Why was I tied up and handcuffed?”
He looked at me quietly for a moment before finally answering. “Do you remember what happened yesterday?” When I shook my head he continued. “I found you outside. When I tried to talk you, you didn’t cooperate with me. I was worried you would do something and hurt someone... or yourself so I took you in. I’m sorry I had to tie you up. It was just a precaution.”
I stared at him, wide-eyed. It had happened again. I had no reason to doubt Allen, which meant that I had truly done it. I sleep walked again. And this time, I had caused Allen trouble. “Shit... I’m sorry, Allen.”
I didn’t know what to do now. I imagined he wanted an explanation. I never said anything before, so he had no idea. And my condition wasn’t exactly on my official medical records. I never really went to the doctor to get it checked on, and I never told my mom so she probably never knew or she would’ve done something about it. I never told anyone about my problem and now I did this to Allen... This was beyond embarrassing.
“Um...” I grimaced slightly and looked at him, not sure where to start.
“Are you okay?” His sudden question threw me off.
“Huh? I mean, yeah, I think so. My body kinda... I kinda hurt in weird places but I think I’m okay.” Maybe. I wasn’t quite sure. It was hard to figure out what was right or wrong with me.
With a small wince, I tried to get my body to move and stretch. I was stiff and my limbs didn’t want to cooperate with me in the slightest. Most of the pain was around my wrists and my injured leg. Whatever I was doing outside last night, I didn’t know, but it put me through the wringer this time. It was just as bad, if not more so than when I woke up the last few times in less than desirable states.
“Hold on, don’t move too much. Let me get you something to put on your wrists.” Allen touched my shoulder before getting up. I watched him go to the kitchen before trying to continue stretching. My body really didn’t want to move. I managed to loosen up the knot between my shoulders a bit by the time Allen came back with an icepack wrapped in a towel. He handed it to me and I muttered my thanks in return.
“...Do you want to tell me about it?”
I set the ice against one of my wrists and held it there. I couldn’t bring myself to look at him, too ashamed and embarrassed to meet his eye. “Well... I... Sometimes I sleepwalk. I never told anyone about it, not even my mom. I didn’t think it was serious. I just moved around in my sleep, sometimes. I never really went far, just to the park down the street. Rarely did I wake up harmed or injured or anything like that, so it didn’t bother me. I didn’t think it was worth worrying about.”
“Then this is the first time this has happened to you?”
I shifted uneasily. “Y-... No. It happened once before, a long time ago. But it was only happened once. It was only an accident, though,” I added quickly, looking up at him. I looked back down just as quickly, switching the icepack to my other wrist.
Allen reached out and curled his hand under my chin. He tilted my head up. “Look at me. Don’t hide, I’m not going to hurt you, James. I just want to know what’s going on. You really... you surprised me last night.”
“I’m sorry... This hasn’t really-- I mean-- ...I don’t know what’s going on. It’s never been this bad before.”
He looked at me quietly, his expression unreadable. I don’t know what he saw on my face or what, I could only imagine what he thought of me. It was really awkward to just stare back and wait for a response. I didn’t know if his reaction would be good or bad. I didn’t want to fall out of his favor.
“Do you want to stay with me?” His question threw me off guard, I just stared back at him. “Just during the night.”
“What? No, no, that’s okay. You don’t have to do that. I already gave you enough trouble.” I leaned back, slipping out of his grip. I didn’t want him to look after me. I didn’t want to be put in his debt. I could find ways to take care of myself without troubling him.
“It won’t trouble me, James.” His hand came down to my arm, making me stop. “I’m concerned. I’d rather know you’re well than find you outside like I had. Who knows what would’ve happened if someone else found you.”
His words weren’t nice to hear. They didn’t really make me feel good at all. “Did I hurt you?” It was my turn to grab him and look for any sign of injury. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
“...No, you didn’t.”
“Fuck... Thank goodness...” I muttered. I would’ve hated myself if I had attacked Allen and did any harm to him. I had no clue what I did, but so long as I didn’t hurt anyone else, least of all someone as kind to me as Allen, I could deal with the problem on my own.
“But James...” I looked up at him. “I’m serious about having you over. It won’t be much trouble, it can only be for a few days if you’re that uncomfortable staying with me. I just want to make sure nothing happens to you.” When I opened my mouth to protest, he cut me off, putting a little pressure on my arm. “I’m not asking this as a cop. I’m asking as a regular person. As someone who likes you and wants you to be safe and well.”
I startled at his words. I had sense not to gape at him, but it still threw me off, how serious he was about me staying over at night. I didn’t know Allen felt so strongly about my well-being. I hadn’t had someone care for me like this in... a long while. Not to say I wasn’t ever loved, but this was different. Allen wasn’t family. Allen wasn’t even a lover. He was a friend. Maybe... even more than just that, if I dared to call it so.
“But...” I met his gaze and held it for a long moment. “Alright. Just for a little while.”
He smiled at me then and I almost thought he looked relieved by my answer. “Good. In the meantime, do you want anything? Are your wrists okay? Would you like something to eat?”
My wrists felt fine. They weren’t exactly better, but the ice blocked out some of the pain so it was okay. I nodded at the offer for food, my stomach twisting at the very mention of it. “Food sounds great. What is it?”
“Anything you want. Eggs, waffles, pancakes, cereal, bagels, cinnamon rolls, biscuits, you name it.”
“Cinnamon rolls?” When he grinned at me and nodded, I couldn’t help but smile back. The atmosphere seemed to lighten now that we weren’t on the subject of my sleeping habits.
Allen helped me up so I could clean up while he made breakfast. I took a look at myself in the bathroom and was relieved to find I didn’t look like I was auditioning for a horror film this time. And no dark clothes this time either. I was normal.
If only I could remember what happened. I never encountered people before. Or at least I never woke up with them still around. It was really scary knowing I had done something to Allen when he found me. Wherever he found me. However he found me. At least I hadn’t hurt him, but the possibility was still there. What if I had? What if I had attacked him? Hurt him? I would never forgive myself.
Sighing, I cleaned my hands and washed my face. I was indebted to Allen. I hoped I could repay him one day.
After drying off, I returned to the main room of the apartment and watched Allen make the cinnamon rolls. He popped them into the oven afterward and then we sat down in the living room while we waited from them to bake. He took a look at my leg again and fixed it up. He said I still needed to be careful, but it looked like it was slowly healing.
We ate before continuing our talk. He asked me the usual questions about how I was doing, if I liked work, if I was managing my bills okay, and a bunch of other stuff. Usually I would get irritated when people poked around like that, playing twenty questions for no particular reason than to simply know what was going on in my life. But I didn’t mind when Allen did it. We’d had this conversation several times already but it never got old.
I guess he was someone I could trust and depend on. Someone I didn’t want to lose.
Close to noon I had to go home and get ready for work. I promised Allen I would let him know when I was off so he knew when to expect me. The plan was to stop by home before I went to his place and bunked down for sleep.
At work I had a heavy shift. Everyone was moving around, people were coming in and out all the time. Even though I wasn’t on my feet much, I was always kept busy. Sometimes I had to double up as host while the host was playing waiter. When it was over all over, Mr. Tsong took me aside before I went home to ask how I was doing and if his miracle food had any help.
I told him that I was on my way to a full recovery but it would still take a while. I’d let him know when I would be able to do my normal shift again. After hearing that, I went home, sent with food again. I called Allen on the way while I was riding the bus. He wasn’t home but would be in another couple hours. I used that time to get home, shower, change, grab a couple things for the night, and do some other chores around the apartment.
I felt awkward about spending the night at Allen’s place. I had been to his apartment for dinner more than once already but this was different. I tried not to think about it too much as I made plans for the next day. If all went well during the night and I managed not to do something stupid or dangerous, I could do something productive about the whole sleepwalking thing. Do some proper research, stuff I should’ve done years ago. Maybe find a solution so I didn’t bother Allen so much.
Allen gave me a call when he arrived home and I met him at his apartment. I brought over the food Mr. Tsong had given me and offered to share it with him if he hadn’t eaten yet. “This is from where, again?” Allen asked as he put the food in the microwave to heat up.
“From work. When I told the owner I had injured my leg he gave it to me. Said it would help me get better.”
“It looks questionable, to be honest,” Allen muttered, though I had a feeling he was just thinking aloud. He probably didn’t mean for me to hear that. “No offense to your boss,” he added as he glanced back at me.
I laughed a bit and shook my head. “I won’t tell him. You don’t have to eat it if you don’t want to. I can just take it home later.”
“No, we can still eat it.”
“Really? I like your cooking better, though.”
Allen looked at me over his shoulder in amusement, brows raised. “That’s a strong compliment. Are you familiar with me enough to say that?”
I leaned against the breakfast bar, arms folded. “Well... I don’t know, am I?” I mused, resting my chin on my arm. “Can I say we’ve known each other that long when we’ve only recently been neighbors? We were just a cop and kid before. Now we’re... friends?”
Allen pulled the food out out of the microwave and divided up the portions between the two of us. He glanced at me as he did so. “I don’t see why not.”
I smiled at him. “Then friends we are. Labels are confusing.” I held out my hands when he handed me my portion and took it to the table. We sat down and ate. We talked a little here and there through the meal, mostly talking but the meal itself. Afterward, I borrowed Allen’s bathroom to get ready for the night before joining him in the living room. We watched some television for a while until I started to get sleepy. “So... how exactly does this work?” I asked, while I was still coherent enough to do so. “I mean, if you’re asleep and I’m asleep, how are you going to keep watch over me?”
Allen turned to look at me. “Don’t worry, I can hear what’s going on in the apartment. If you make any noise, I’ll know. And the only way out is the front door and I’m pretty sure I’ll know if it opens and closes. I’m not a heavy sleeper.”
“Oh. Alright, I guess.”
Allen kept me company for a while longer until I started dozing off. He left me alone with the television to hunker down on the couch. He gave me a blanket and pillow for the night and told me goodnight before moving off to his room. I told him the same before lying down and curling under the blanket.
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